Last night, I told my 5 year old daughter that we were going to have to go vote today.
"But I already voted, Mommy!" she replied.
"You did? Who did you vote for?"
" For the one who begins with the letter (x)".
"Good!"
"Yeah!" She holds her arms out, hands flat, one arm higher then the other. "If he gets more votes that the bar will look like this. But if the other one gets more votes..." she switches the heights of her arms, reversing them "then the bars will look like this. And if it looks like this," she puts her hands even with each other, "then that means they got the same votes."

Hm. My 5 year old understands bar graphs better then some of my freshmen in college.

I feel like I've posted about this before, but I can't see where, so I probably just meant to. I've been grading papers, still and again, and I am constantly amazed at the quality of some of the work. Or, should I say, lack thereof? Shouldn't a freshman in college know that the x- axis has to be in numerical order? 1 comes before 2, and 2 comes before 3. My sister, who teaches elementary school, tells me that her third graders know this basic rule. And if that isn't bad enough, it is often painfully clear that they don't read their own work. I understand that these students don't know how to use excel, yet, but if they would just look at the chart after they plot it, they would immediately see that it is wrong.

I've gotten graphs that are sideways, upside down, the wrong data, or completely lacking any data. I've told them to make an XY scatter graph, and I get a bar graph. And vice versa. I've told them to put their variables on each axis, and instead I get random numbers on the axis. Forget about actually labeling the axis or including a descriptive title. Then, I read their discussion where they supposedly interpret the graph, and the two don't correlate. I'll see that A is higher then B- in the table of results. The graph is uninterpretable. They conclude that their hypothesis was supported because B was higher then A. This just further illustrates how useful a good graph can be, when done properly. So why is this so difficult to understand? Am I just setting my expectations too high?

I am worried about one of my students. (S)he has missed their third class, today- the limit for the semester. This unmotivated student (UMS) has therefore missed one of four in lab quizzes, not to mention a very thorough analysis of the data we've collected over the past several weeks- data which will be used to write the formal lab report, which is worth almost half of their entire grade.

UMS just received a mid term warning that their grade, as of last week, was a D+. I am afraid, after missing class this week, that there is no way to improve upon that; I just don't think it is possible for UMS to work through the data on their own, and an unexcused absence doesn't require- or inspire- make-up time.

I have no experience with this sort of situation. This first-year student is obviously struggling- due to a lack of motivation, poor work ethic, or other problems, and I hope this doesn't scar them- or their record- forever, but...

if they won't do the work, I can't do it for them.

I may have to suggest to UMS that they withdraw for the semester and take the class again in the spring.

I think this is the most frustrating aspect of my teaching experience so far. No, I take that back. The most frustrating thing is when you have a student who really wants to get it... but doesn't. This UMS is frustrating, also, but in an irritating- trying to be patient but I feel like I'm wasting my time- sort of way.

And then I get annoyed that I am irritated, because I should be better then that.

So I think I will take my annoyingly irritated and frustrated I'm only human self and go have a glass of wine and try to find a t.v. channel that is not talking about the election. Because I am trying to wind down... not up.

Maybe I'd better read a book, instead.

My high didn't last long. I mean, dreaming about a job is all well and good, but meantime, I have two that are real and require actual work. And oh boy, the work I have this week...

We are starting the first week of a three week lab in the class I am teaching; this week will be a lot of background material and very little actual lab work. And the background material has a lot to do with rates of change and the associated calculus.

When we had an organizational meeting last week, the Wise Professor who actually wrote this lab tells us "Your students will be intimidated by the math. Don't let them be." So I casually turn to the page with all the math... it is easy to find, what with the f(x)'s and such... and holy crap I AM INTIMIDATED.

Do you know how long it has been since I have taken a math class? Um, wait, it takes more then two hands to count, and if I can't use my fingers than it is beyond me.

So I've been googling rates of change. Right now I am on the high school calculus help page, relearning (which would be accurate if I'd ever really learned it in the first place) about derivatives and such. Do you know, Wikepedia has a definition of a derivative. It made perfect sense for the first few sentences, and then I scrolled down. What?

Maybe I'm just tired. I'll deal with it tomorrow. Class isn't until Thursday.

Meanwhile, anyone who can help me with this... think ELEMENTARY CALCULUS...(is that an oxymoron?)... please feel free to comment with a nice primer on what the f that f in f(x1)-f(x0) is.

Addendum:
OK OK, I got it.
y = f(x). f'(x), is the derivative of f(x)

And if m= delta y / delta x, then
for (x+h, f(x+h) :
delta y/ delta x = f(x+h) - f(x) / (x + h) - x = f(x+h) - f(x) / h

Duh.

Don't even get me started on tangent lines. I don't know how to type all that mathematical stuff in to blogger.

I know this is the second time in two semesters that I am teaching the same class. I thought it would get easier. And it has.. and hasn't.

On one hand, I am more familiar with the material. There are a lot more sections so there are more of us teaching the same thing, and the support is incomparable. So yes, it is easier.

On the other hand... I am realizing what a bad job I did last semester. I am realizing how much I missed. I am learning what I should have taught versus what I actually did teach. In fact, because I am teaching two sections, I am even changing my presentation from my monday to my thursday lab; and it is the thursday section that is performing better on homework and quizzes, which hopefully means that by the third time around... I'm getting it right.

So even though I thought I had all the hard work done, I am finding myself spending a great deal of time prepping for class... the right way (I hope!) this time.

I just read through the evaluations from my first class- ever, and I have to say, they weren't so bad. Not great, not bad. For the most part, they were uninspiring. Then there were a few that I have to remind myself... the only people who actually write something usually have strong opinions, negative or positive. Of course, they weren't all negative...

for example:

Worst thing about the course:
The teacher!
(Ouch! That's harsh!)

Best thing about the course:
The teacher!

What did you like least about the instructor’s teaching?
There was no direction during the lab. We came in and just read through the lab manual and did the lab to the best of our ability.

What did you like most about the instructor’s teaching?
She did the labs with us if we had any trouble.

What did you like least about the instructor’s teaching?
She assigns a lot of homework and she teaches very little.

What did you like most about the instructor’s teaching?
Easy grading. Gave good feedback on assignments she gave back.

What did you like least about the instructor’s teaching?
She doesn't answer our questions.

What did you like most about the instructor’s teaching?
Very helpful and always there to answer questions.

Are you catching the drift, here? These evaluations are not very helpful. Also, it was a small enough class that I can almost figure out who said what. The comments about how I didn't explain the assignments probably came from the student who was extremely smart but lost major points because he never followed directions. The comment about how "everything was unclear and there was no direction and most of the time I didn't know what the assignments were or where to get them or how to do them or when they were due..." which was one long run on sentence was probably from the student who lost points because she wrote her formal lab report as one long run on paragraph which didn't have any punctuation and who would look at me with a blank vacant look whenever I tried to explain things to her. In my mind I can visualize her saying those things.

It is also interesting that I set aside class time for the students to fill out the evaluations; there were 14 kids in class that day... but only 12 evaluations were submitted. So... what happened to the other two?

And finally, there was only one 'additional comment':
She is a very nice person but very unclear with a lot of things that she wanted us to do for her lab. Sometimes she seemed like she didnt know what she was doing.

And that... I can't argue. See all my previous posts about the missing equipment; the labs that I was informed at the start of class would be delayed because reagents hadn't arrived yet... ;
discrepencies between the lab manual and the actual lab; and of course, my own idiocy when I couldn't seem to follow my own notes.

And yet, I've signed on to do it again. Two classes in the fall, and two in the spring. The coordinator promised me that next time it will be much better.
Damn tootin straight. No matter what the students say, I've learned a lot this year.

Dear Professor ----:

I am writing you this email in regards to a request. I recieved a B in Biology lab for this semester. I wanted to ask that that grade be changed to a B+. I feel this is a resonable request based on my progress and effort put forth in the class and also my perfect attendance. I am going to be applying to medical schools in the near future and a high GPA is a necessity for admission into med schools. The B+ would improve my average and be greatly appreciated. Thank you for considering this request and thank you for a great year.

John Doe

I have a graduate student working with me these 12 weeks. It is an unusual situation; she is actually only volunteering here while visiting her husband, a fellow in one of the clinical departments. They are from India, and he moved to the States one week after they were married; she has come out to visit but needs to go back for one more year of her graduate studies.

Things are going well. She has good hands, which means that she gets good clean results. She is meticulous, which means she moves slowly. Sometimes a little too slowly… but, she is volunteering her time with me after all, so I can’t complain. Occasionally, I wish I could just do the work myself; but I know when she is gone I will wish I had her back.

We have one little problem, however. It is a communication issue. For the first few weeks I thought perhaps I wasn’t communicating effectively; but that has never been a weakness of mine. However, I made an effort to slow down, and wrote as I spoke so she could see and hear my instructions… and then have them written for her reference. I made a point of telling her why we need to do a certain experiment, what I was hoping the result will be, and the detailed protocol on how to do it. Even so, I found that there was still an issue. It was quite frustrating.

Yesterday, however, I realized what the problem was.

She thinks I’m an idiot.

She is constantly questioning me… but not in a positive, inquisitive, manner. She is second guessing me, my motives, and my methods.

And she smiles so politely as she does it.

It is quite irritating, really.

Well, there is nothing to be done about it. I know I am not an idiot. My resume speaks to that. I’ll just have to keep on explaining myself… maybe eventually the results will prove that I do know what I’m talking about. Of course, this being science, there is a greater likelihood that the experiments won’t work.

I’ll just have to look at it as one of those challenges; I’m sure, if I continue to teach, I’ll always have that student who thinks they are smarter and better. And some of them will be… but that doesn’t mean they don’t have more to learn.

I had my detailed notes in my hand. I was trying to clarify a confusing concept, and had decided that a good old fashioned chalk talk was the only way to do it.

But then I got confused. I thought I had things backward, so I switched them. That didn’t look right, so I switched them again. And again.

Finally, the students shouted out the correct answer.

That’s one way to teach them, I guess.

BTW, my notes were correct.

After that, they were more confused. One student even told me “I thought I understood before I got here but now I don’t get it.”

Oh yeah. I loved to hear that.

On the scale of tough exams, this one falls very low. Compared with a final, piece of cake. Compared with a qualifying exam, piece of cake. Compared with a PhD dissertation defense... a crumb off of a very large piece of cake.

As I type this my class is taking their first in-lab quiz. I wrote it. I know all the answers. So why am I so nervous?

It is because it is my first quiz, the first that I've ever written, the first that I've ever distributed, the first that ever counts towards someone's actual grade.

And the whole reality comes slamming down on me. Sshhhhaaaa-BAM. I am teaching an actual college class. I have to give out grades. These grades will go on their transcripts. Forever.

My only consolation is that I don't remember my bio 100 lab. So maybe years from now they won't either. Hopefully they'll get a good foundation for their future. I'd like to think they'll remember me but... the lesson for today is don't need to sweat the small stuff.

I have finally recovered from grading my first homework assignment.

I started out by naively assuming that it would be a piece of cake. It was a very simple assignment, the class could practically cut and paste the information off the web, cross check with the extremely detailed instructions, and hand it in for a perfect score.

First, 20% of the class didn't even bother to hand it in.
Another 60% of the class apparently needed even more detailed instructions.
15% of the class sought to impress me by handing in a bigger and better assignment... only half of them didn't do it the right way and the rest... well, instead of impressing me it just made me have to look over more pages... and left me wishing they would just follow the directions.

The first time I went through and reviewed them all I finished up and I had a big black cloud over my head. If I had graded things then, everyone would have failed.

Instead, I took two days, then came up with a rubric for how to grade the assignments. I am quite proud of that, because until two days ago I didn't even know what a rubric was. Anyway, that helped keep me fair and balanced, and at the end of the day they didn't all do as badly as I originally perceived (because I was nice).

However, after a review this week, they are going to get either a pop-quiz or a repeat homework assignment next week. That'll teach em.

I hope.

The Fundamentals of Teaching, as I've learned so far.
1. Get to know your students, where they are coming from and what their motivations are.
2. Structure your sections/ classes. Have a Beginning, Middle, and End.
3. Teach to all the different learning styles.

That's it, folks.

I showed my sister, an elementary school teacher, the 30 page booklet I got at my most recent "Fundamentals of Teaching" workshop. That, sad to say, is the most official training document I've gotten. She laughed; she went to school for four years and then got a masters degree before she was put in charge of her own class. She tried to make me feel better about my lack of experience, but the only thing that will make me feel better about it is... experience.

Granted, undergraduate science and elementary education are very different.

The students are bigger.

I've been told not to discount all the years I've had as a student, and all the mentoring I've done in the lab, and all the presentations and seminars I've given over the years. Those count as training, apparently.

I'm just glad that the first class I teach is a lab. If I can get through the first day, the rest should be- well- should be cake.

But that first day... it's a week away and I'm already having anxiety about it!